When You Understand What Happened But Still Feel It: What is EMIT?

Sep 28

5 min read

Sometimes you can understand exactly why you feel the way you do and still find yourself reacting in the same way.

You might know logically that you're safe now. You might understand where a pattern came from, know that something wasn't your fault, or have talked about an experience many times.

And yet something can still get activated.

A memory might still bring up a strong emotional response. Something happening in the present might trigger feelings that seem much bigger than the situation itself. Or you might find yourself falling into an old pattern even though part of you knows you don't need to respond that way anymore.

This is one of the reasons I use Eye Movement Integration Therapy, or EMIT, in my work.

What is EMIT?

Eye Movement Integration Therapy is a therapeutic approach that uses guided eye movements when working with distressing experiences, memories and emotional responses.

Unlike talking about an experience alone, EMIT gives us another way of working with something that may still be affecting you in the present.

The aim isn't to erase a memory or make you forget what happened.

You still know what happened, but the way you experience it may change.

Why can I understand something and still react to it?

One of the things people often say in therapy is:

“I know that logically, but it doesn't feel that way.”

You might know:

I'm safe now.

It wasn't my fault.

I'm good enough.

That relationship is over.

This person isn't the person who hurt me.

I don't need to protect myself in the same way anymore.

And yet your response doesn't always match what you know.

Something happening now might bring up an emotion, physical response or familiar reaction that feels connected to something you've experienced before.

Understanding where something comes from can be incredibly valuable. But sometimes understanding something logically doesn't automatically change the emotional response that comes with it.

EMIT can be one option when something still feels emotionally charged despite having already made sense of it logically.

What happens if we decide to use EMIT?

EMIT isn't something we jump straight into.

If you're new to working with me and interested in EMIT, we'll begin with an Individual Therapy session. This gives us time to understand what's happening, what you'd like to work on and whether EMIT is an appropriate option for you.

We'll also make sure you're appropriately prepared before beginning processing. EMIT processing then takes place in a dedicated session.

You'll remain awake and aware throughout, you're able to communicate with me, and you can pause at any time.

Do I have to tell you everything that happened?

No. We'll need to talk enough for me to understand what's happening and what you'd like to work on, but you don't need to give me a detailed account of every aspect of an experience before we begin.

For some people, knowing this makes the idea of working with a difficult experience feel a little more manageable.

What can EMIT be used for?

EMIT was originally developed particularly for working with traumatic and distressing memories.

Depending on the individual, I may consider EMIT when we're working with things such as:

anxiety and panic;
fears and phobias;
persistent pain;
trauma and distressing life experiences;
triggers that bring up a strong emotional response;
relationship or attachment experiences from the past;
memories that continue to feel emotionally charged;
negative beliefs about yourself connected with previous experiences;
experiences you understand logically but that continue to affect you emotionally; and
aspects of grief and loss that remain particularly emotionally charged.

It isn't necessarily about having experienced one enormous traumatic event.

Sometimes what continues to affect us comes from a particular period of life, repeated experiences or exposure to difficult or distressing situations, rather than one particular event. And sometimes something that may not seem significant to someone else was significant to you.

The more useful question isn't necessarily “Was this bad enough to count?” but how the experience is affecting you now.

EMIT isn't appropriate for everyone or every concern. We'll consider what you're experiencing, what you'd like to work on and whether EMIT is an appropriate approach for you.

EMIT also doesn't replace appropriate medical, psychological or other healthcare assessment and treatment where this is required.

Is EMIT the same as EMDR?

No. EMIT and EMDR are different therapeutic approaches.

Both use eye movements as part of the therapeutic process, but they developed separately and are approached differently.

I'll explore the similarities and differences in more detail in a separate article on EMIT and EMDR.

What does EMIT feel like?

There isn't one particular way EMIT is supposed to feel.

People experience the process differently.

You might notice emotions or physical sensations. You might remember something you hadn't thought about for a while, make a connection you hadn't made before, or notice that the way you're experiencing something begins to change.

Some people notice quite clear shifts during a session. For others, changes can be more subtle.

A memory might feel further away.

Something that previously felt very intense might feel less emotionally charged.

A physical sensation might change.

You might see something from a different perspective.

Or something you've known logically for a long time might begin to feel different emotionally as well.

There's nothing you need to force and no particular response you're expected to have.

What happens after an EMIT session?

Everyone responds differently.

Some people notice changes during the session itself, while others continue to notice things afterwards.

You may become aware of new thoughts, insights, memories, dreams or changes in the way you respond to something over the following days.

We'll talk about what you may notice afterwards and check in on what's changed when we next meet.

How many EMIT sessions will I need?

There isn't a set number that applies to everyone.

It depends on what we're working with, what happens during processing and whether there are other things that need attention.

EMIT also doesn't need to become the only way we work together. Sometimes it may form one part of broader therapy, while for another person only a small amount of processing may be appropriate.

We'll work this out together rather than deciding in advance how many sessions you should have.

EMIT as part of therapy

I don't see EMIT as replacing talking therapy, and I don't think every difficult experience needs to be processed.

Sometimes understanding what's happening is exactly what you need.

Sometimes something in your life now needs to change.

Sometimes you need practical strategies, new experiences or a different way of responding.

And sometimes you've already done a lot of understanding, but something from the past continues to carry an emotional weight in the present.

That's one of the places EMIT can fit.

The aim isn't to endlessly search through your past or remove every uncomfortable emotion. Being human comes with uncomfortable emotions.

For me, the value of this work is in helping the past take up less space in the present, so there's more room for the life you're living now and where you want to go from here.